AH CHOO!

my flu doesnt seem to be getting any better man..it got better for one day den now its like stagnant! the area under my nose feels so raw cause it undergoes friction from tissue every few mins!!! not to mention my throat. argh. and i tink because of my sickness, im feeling under e weather. like ignoring ppl on msn. sorry guys. just dun feel like talking. pardon me.

daddy came home today! the house somehow feels more complete with him ard though i dun spend much time at home la i admit. *guilty* i miss slapping his tummy every 5 mins when i sit beside him on e sofa. hahaha.

i hate being taken for granted. dun take my kindness and helpfulness for granted. dun irritate me. dun think that everything is so 理所当然. dun piss me off. i dun like to be pissed off.

i realize that im very much a contradictory person. i can hate u alot for the things u have done and have not done. but den realize u are quite harmless mild and prob din do it on purpose and start thinking actually u aint that bad. like u din want things to happen this way. but i tink mayb deep in my heart i detest u for infringing on the parts of my life i wanna keep to myself. but den on e other hand, thank u for causing these disturbances in my life to slap me awake and thus making me a better person. but den i realize hey u wld be a ok person to me if u din enter my life this way and we end up as friends. like how contradictory is that.

and i think i might actually be quite possessive in a way huh. not as magnanimous as i tink i am. i protect the things i love with such utmost defence that it affects me emotionally. maybe i shld just learn to take things easy. why take everything so hard. its afterall only a one way thing.

and like one of the blogthings say, i put myself the last. and i think its really true. i realize whenever i have to make a decision or wadever, its like so incorporated into my brain and my life, that ill conside the stand of other parties first. some ppl will just say im nice. but like the saying goes, NICE GUYS FINISH LAST. so, why be nice right. i shall try to be mean. MEAN-sy is my name afterall wad.

well, at least my supposedly power mth JUNE is coming. mayb ill be powerful den. like invincible. haha.

tauhway plans for tonight were cancelled due to some miscommunication to my utmost dismay. was so looking forward to some nice silky tau hway to slide down my painful throat. but owell. shit happens.

plans for the week look cool. meeting lily tmr afternoon for a bit of catching up before work. sat hopefully meeting her, yy and tf for lunch! if our schedules dont clash!!! and sun PAINTBALL!!! whee! but im super broke la. yi and min are back from BKK already, so time to meet the girls! caues bra has officially stopped flying for the time being! yay! and of cos e 2c gang. its been i tink a mth since we last met! zhuoyan's not coming back this hols thou. so wont get to see him till december. and i haven seen PS in the longest. shes such an ass! and climbing on tues evenings sounds quite exciting la. if only i can drag mine down and do it too! haha. and i still wanna watch da vinci code! neh neh pok.

i need retail therapy. *sigh* but i got no money. *whines*

ignore me.