Sue told me to pray to God.
She said God will help you in ur darkest hour.
It may not seem like he is.
but he is.

She said.
Be honest with him.
Tell him ur angry
Tell him ur sad
Tell him ur hurt
Tell him ur pain
Tell him the truths.

So i did.
i clasped my hands together.
and i told him.
I told him how sad i am
how miserable i was.
how hurt i am.
and how tired i am.
i told him.
Please help me
Help me find a way out.
Help me out of this ditch.
Please help me.
I really need some help.
Please help me.
Please take the brain away.
Please take the pain away.
Take it all away.
Help me out.

Then i thought. What else?
Then i told him.
Please help you.
Like what the hell.
After all thats happened.
I still asked him to help you.
I asked him to help u to stop tripping over the stones.
I asked him to help you out.
When you need help.
I asked him to take care of you.

I must be crazy.
There's only that little bit of sane part left in my heart
and part of it still goes to you.
The person that took the rest of it away.

Then i told him.
im not sure whether i want you to really help him
because sometimes i want you to hurt.
as much as me.
somtimes it seems you dont need much help.
but sometimes it seems like you do.
and i care about you.
still.

I think He must be confused.

Dear God, Please help us find a way out.
If youre helping him first, remember to come by and help me.
I need some help.

Amen.