i guess i've come a long way from a month ago.
a very long way.

nowadays.
im eating better.
sleeping so-so.

smiling more.

i guess its what lily calls the normalization effect.
whatever pain there is.
its been painful for so long.
its so painful.
that its normal.

heart pain?
grief?
normal lah.

just breathe.
let it hurt.
and den do your stuff.

read something that broke your heart?
breathe.
pain.
let the pain seep through.
den do your stuff.

see something that reminds you of him?
breathe.
allow yourself a few tears.
do your stuff.

life goes on.
no matter whether your heart is intact or not.

she mailed me this story.



放下

她说：“我放不下一些事，放不下一些人。”
他说：“没有什么东西是放不下的。”
她说：“这些事和人我就偏偏放不下。”

他让她拿着一个茶杯，然后就往里面倒热水，一直倒，到水溢出来。
她被烫到马上松开了手。

他说：“这个世界上没有什么事是放不下的，痛了，你自然就会放下。”



为什么我还没有放下
可是真的很痛阿
我都被热水烫了几次了

感觉上就像是
手里拿着茶杯
热水一直倒
我也就继续地握着茶杯
不肯松手

在敷完药以后
我还是坚持去拿起茶杯

或许是希望下次倒的不是热水

就算是热水
或许现在皮厚了
感觉上就像是冷水



how are you today?
haven heard a squeak from you.
i hope you are well.