just got back from a night out with the smu buds.
its been a nice night out. yesterday too.
laughed so hard with my colleagues. pple had to shhh us.
even though worries were stuck at the back of my mind.
just like that time at steamboat. where someone actually threw water down at us to shut us up.
im just glad i was doing something on a tues night.

just chilling.
drinking. snacking. laughing.
but aye. wherever i go. there will still be lil parts of you.
unless i intend to avoid the world.

so i just have to face it.

we went there with ridge before.
3rd day of cny i rem.
did u know.
now they have tents. cool.

the guitarist there. ur friend.
bah. luckily he didnt recognize me.
den i saw that random drummer from soap.

seriously still everywhere.

but as she sang.
acoustic style.
i couldnt help but get drawn to her voice.
the songs
the lyrics.
she even smiled at me.

i could get used to this.

just going somewhere watching some nice live band.

drinking a beer.

even alone.

that would be nice.

i saw their wedding invitation.

nice. nice to know ppl still end up together.

i wonder.

what made u low.

but im glad uve gotten out of it. whatever it is.

i am.

for now at least.

sincerely glad.

maybe you have learnt somehow to sort out ur thoughts.

no longer the same confused stressed lil boy are you?

im glad for you. truly.

today i read the first entry i posted.

the first one since the long hiatus.

and boy have i moved from then.

yes it still hurts.

but i guess its of a different nature. different source. different intensity.

and i wondered.

how would things have been different.

but hey. minsy. stop using brain cells on this kinda crap. (lynn says)

stop analyzing everything u see. u read.

yeayea. its true.

i cant stop my brain from working hard

but yea ill stop myself from over thinking.

i will.

presenting my new best friend, Beary!

Hes labelled Teddy. but i like beary more. haha.

i like how hes a lil distorted. a lil not as cute. a lil imperfect.

i like how he smiles everywhere he goes.

even when i accidentally crush him under my laptop

i like how he likes to sprawl on my table like a star.

just like me. haha.

whenever im a lil sad.

i jsut have to look at him.

spread hands wide on the table.

with that silly smile.

ill smile and pat him.