i think im a confused person.

i dont know whether i want you to be happy or not.

When you're happy, it kills me.
i think its cause the happiness is linked to her.

When you're not happy, it kills me too.
i hate to see u unhappy.
thats my biggest downfall.

and i know its not like before.
i dont know whether there will be anyone who will listen to your problems.
someone to analyze ur random thoughts.
someone to give you an insight.
do you have someone u trust?
someone u can tell your unfiltered thoughts without worrying.
oh but u didnt really trust me towards the end.
do you have someone you can share ur thoughts with.
ah.
*sees approaching arrow*
her.
ah fuck it.
why am i caring.

i only wanted the best for you.
there has to be a name for the disease i have.
to be this confused.

i loved you so much.
i gave you only the best.
i wanted to make it up to you.
everything u missed out when you were young.
everything you couldnt have.
everything you didnt have.
all the love and attention you didnt have.
i wanted to give them all to you.
thats why i gave everything to you.

but i didnt know.
you dont give your everything away.
thats stupid.

i always accepted everything you did and didnt do.
because i loved you.
i accepted.
i compromised.
cause i wanted only the best for you.
i let you sleep in on all your rest days.
because i wanted you to have lots of rest.
to be bright eyed bushy tailed.

i never asked for anything.
except for you.
and your heart.

but now i know thats not the way silly.
you dont give ur everything u silly girl.

you dont.