Wistful thoughts on a Sunday evening

it was nice.
to really laugh.
and enjoy the company like friends do.

i realized it was really strange calling out to you.

cause i never really called you by ur name much.
thats why its really strange and weird calling u by name.
weird awkward.

today's the 24th.
there's a sense of wistfulness.
but its okay!
these dates. are mere numbers.
mere days.

love.
does not go around mere numbers.

i worry.
i fear.

but really
i shouldnt.

i will just love.

♥♥♥

theres so many things i shld do.
check out my laptop warranty, register for my driving basic, and a million other things.
amongst that, i would like to check out the bodyworlds exhibition and a million other movies.
get a magharita, a starbucks to drink.

♥♥♥

yesterday
my little cousin cried

while everyone was helping out with her homework
(she just started sec sch)
when she told my aunt to help her draw something
i blurted out
dont help her. dont always help her. let her try and do herself first.
because i wanted her to learn to be independent.

and she cried.

maybe it was her mom.
if my aunt was ard.
she would have helped her.

and i felt like crying too.

im sorry.
really am.

i dont know if it was me.
but still i am.

as she teared.
her dad came by and asked why
and he looked at her cry.

and i realized
his heart must have been breaking for his lil daughter too.

being a traditional chinese family
we never spoke openly about moving on with her
we never did
and as her death anniversary looms near
we are all reminded of that fateful day
we lost one of our loved ones.

Dear God, Dear Ergugu

im sorry
i didnt do a good job
i promise to try harder
i promise to bring her to swensens like i promised
i promise ill bring them prawning the next chance i have

and i promise to keep my promise to you

Please look after her
and the rest of them.
they know they have us.
but i know sometimes thats just not enough.

give them warmth, comfort and peace.

Thank You.