the nights are always the worse. thats why i never ever message u before i sleep. for fear of sounding needy. for fear of losing control. for fear of losing my pretense.


nights are when u let down ur defenses, peel down ur facades, let ur guard down.
and its when the bad thoughts start invading u.


i miss u the most at nights.


i'd always liked sleeping beside you. anywhere around you. so that when i awake, i can see you.

you could be on ur chair playing your guitar, with the loud electric music. or just surfin the net. or just checking out cool videos. when we first got together, i couldnt take it. so noisy! but as time went by, i was usually lulled to sleep with the music.

i like sleeping beside you while you insisted on playing PSP. while the lights shone beside me with over enthusiastic game sounds, i was lulled to sleep. but to my amazement, when i awake 2 hours u can still be at it. haha.

most of all, i like sleeping beside u with ur arms around me. my entire body gently nestled into yours. both arms cradling me gently. sometimes u pat me to sleep. gently. cause i told you i like it. while we slowly adjust ourselves into a comfortable position with grunts. or move away because of the heat. but later move back into position seeking the same pair of arms.


in the morning when i open my eyes. when i see you. no matter whether sitting on ur chair grinning at me like a chershire cat. for not coming to bed as promised. or smiling at me and saying "hi buns!". or chiding me for saying i have bad breath. i love them all.

the best part is when you're asleep. those fluttery lashes. peaceful face. bad breath. sweet lips. occasional jerks. weird noises. and i feel peace in my heart.


good night to you tonight. may you have a sweet restful sleep.
i love you.