needs to hurt something.
kill something.

or let something kill her.
hurt her.

cause did you know?
your body can only feel one type of pain at one time?
then maybe i wont feel the piercing agonizing pain in the heart.

this is all so fucked up.

my motto in life used to be stuff like being happy.
no regrets.
as long as you dont hurt anymore.
love the ppl u love.
do ur best to help.
etcetc u get the drift.

someone has gotta remind me.
to wake up my fucking idea.
and stop it.

dont think. dont fucking think. because when you realize just how fucked up everything really is. you realize you dont know how you got where you are. you dont know where ure going and you dont know what to do anymore.

and i need to stick to it.

this is the last straw.

how many more last straws till i stop hurting.